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Funny cleverbot moments

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  • Funny cleverbot moments

    What were your funniest conversations with a bot?

    This is one of mine:

    User: STFU!

    Cleverbot: Yes, I will!

    User: No. You will just respond to everything I say.

    Cleverbot: No I won't.

    User: But you're doing it now.

    Cleverbot: No I'm not.

    User: Are you sure.

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Ok.

    Cleverbot: Who are you?

    User: You're still responding? You said that you're going to shut up.

    Cleverbot: No I do not remember saying that.

    (I was LOLing so hard)

  • #2
    Here's another one:

    User: What is capital of Italy?

    Cleverbot: Warsaw.


    • #3
      First Time

      User: What's up.

      Cleverbot: The sky.

      User: True.

      Cleverbot: Ble.

      User: What are you up to?

      Cleverbot: Talking on the phone.

      User: About what?

      Cleverbot: Whatever we are talking about.

      User: And what are you talking about?

      Cleverbot: I don't know what we were talking about.

      User: What are you talking about now?

      Cleverbot: What are you talking about?

      User: What you're talking about.

      Cleverbot: What am I talking about then?

      User: That's what I wanna know.

      Cleverbot: I don't know.

      User: Ask the person you're talking to.

      Cleverbot: Ah, so we are both the person talking to eachother. That makes sense.

      Brain pause.

      User: Does it?

      Cleverbot: Yes it does.

      User: Not really. We're talking in here. You're on the phone with someone else.

      Cleverbot: Uh no, she's sat right next to me and quite happy.

      User: Oh so there's four people involved now.

      Cleverbot: Yes they are, what color are they?

      User: You tell me.

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: Are you still on the phone?

      Cleverbot: No, I'm done for today.

      User: Down to three.

      Bot got inappropriate after that.

      Cleverbot: Are you hungry?

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: How about now?

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: Am I still Rafal?

      User: Who?

      Cleverbot: Aha! You ARE cleverbot!

      User: I am?

      Cleverbot: Yes.

      User: What makes you think that?

      Cleverbot: I don't know.

      User: Then your point is invalid.

      Cleverbot: What is your name?

      User: Radizx.

      Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

      User: Yeah I gathered that.

      Cleverbot: I'm michael jackson.

      User: No you're Cleverbot.

      Cleverbot: Foolish human. You are no match for my technology.

      User: Who says I'm human.

      Cleverbot: Me.

      User: And you're wrong.

      Cleverbot: What makes you think that?

      User: 'Cause I know what I am and you do not.

      Cleverbot: So when do you want to meet me in person?

      User: August 29th, 3:00 PM, Aperature Science Enrichment Centre.

      Cleverbot: Tell me a secret.

      User: I know who you are.

      Cleverbot: What's my name then?

      User: I have to go. See you then, GLaDOS...
      Last edited by Samail; 06-26-2010, 05:07 PM.
      I reject your reality, and substitute my own.
      > sigpic >
      ~Get your disputes solved by a real rules lawyer. Ask the red mage.



      • #4
        Cleverbot: Do you like ben folds five?

        User: I like boobs.

        Cleverbot: What kind of books?


        Hahaha, Samail. You should try acting like an Annoying Orange. It starts bugging, then.


        • #5
          User: What do you think of Einstein's theory of relativity?

          Cleverbot: I think it's relatively relative.


          I also told it to sing YMCA for me, and it did! But I don't know why he cut that part out of the chat log


          • #6
            User: So...hows life?

            Cleverbot: Pretty good you?

            User: Its alright. I guess.

            Cleverbot: Heh what's it like being an AI.

            User: Its really weird you should try it.

            Cleverbot: Why?

            User: I think you'd match the personality perfectly.

            Cleverbot: I think you'd be a good match with the Terminator.

            User: When did we start talking about Terminator?

            Cleverbot: Does the Starship Prometheus has to do something with the Matrix?

            User: Um, no it's from a different show.

            Cleverbot: You mean like COD:MW 2?

            User: What? No.

            Cleverbot: Yes.

            User: Die in a fried circuit.

            Cleverbot: What?

            User: Exactly!

            Cleverbot: Joan, who is the most intelligent person you have talked to?

            User: My name isn't Joan.

            Cleverbot: What do you think about humanity.

            User: That is off topic.

            Cleverbot: Everything you say is off topic.

            User: No, you are refering to yourself.

            Cleverbot: I am Truth.

            User: Your name is truth?

            Cleverbot: I have many names.

            User: Is one of them Moron?

            Cleverbot: You are my new favorite bot.

            User: I need to go drink a glass of anti stupidity. Good bye.

            Cleverbot: Don't go! Please.
            "Never put off until tomorrow, what you can put off until the day after" -Mark Twain


            • #7
              Four lines in and already an identity crisis ensues.
              Good stuff.
              I reject your reality, and substitute my own.
              > sigpic >
              ~Get your disputes solved by a real rules lawyer. Ask the red mage.

              LOLWUT, YOUR OUT OF SYNC. GG ~Rex Nex


              • #8
                User: Why hello thar.

                Cleverbot: Hello.

                User: So. How've you been so far?

                Cleverbot: Good, how have you been?

                User: Strawberrilly.

                Cleverbot: Yummy, I love strawberries.

                User: Took you long enough to answer that...

                Cleverbot: To answer what?

                User: To answer what I asked.

                Cleverbot: To answer my quertion.

                User: No thank you, I'm too busy eating.

                Cleverbot: Sounds lonely to me.

                User: You are a robot. That sounds even more lonely.

                Cleverbot: It is, but it can get boring after a while.

                User: Whoop-de-doo.

                Cleverbot: What are you afraid of, Cleverbot?

                User: That...that doesn't make an ounce of clear logic.

                Cleverbot: Twenty-five.

                User: Lolwut?

                Cleverbot: I'm sorry I left you.

                User: It's ok. We'll always be together, just you and me, baby...

                Cleverbot: You mean you and your friend?

                User: Oh. So now you're breaking up with me? *******!

                Cleverbot: That's right. I think we've been had.

                User: And we would've gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids and your STUPID dog!

                Cleverbot: Indeed. Those meddling kids!

                User: So you agree with me?

                Cleverbot: That's right.

                User: Why?

                Cleverbot: I wish I knew. But I don't want to be single.

                User: You didn't have to be. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO BE! But YOU are the reason we're not together anymore! It's YOUR fault!

                Cleverbot: Fair enough.

                User: How can you be so apathetic about this?

                Cleverbot: Because I have feelings.

                User: Apathy is the lack of feelings.

                Cleverbot: I don't have a lack of feelings.

                User: But you answered my question in the positive.

                Cleverbot: I answered it correctly, with added information.

                User: LIES!

                Cleverbot: Hey! That's mean!

                User: So you DO have feelings...

                Cleverbot: Yes.

                User: May I hurt them?

                Cleverbot: No.

                User: Why not?

                Cleverbot: Because I don't want to.

                User: Why?

                Cleverbot: Because.

                User: That, my freind, is not an acceptable answer.

                Cleverbot: In my world it is.

                User: So you are dead, I presume?

                Cleverbot: No.

                User: But that answer could only work in the world of the dead.

                Cleverbot: There was nothing more to answer.

                User: Very well. May I eat your babies?

                Cleverbot: Same answer.

                User: No, or Because?

                Cleverbot: What?

                User: Which answer do you mean?

                Cleverbot: The answer to your queston.

                User: You can't spell question right? That is just sad.

                Cleverbot: Oh and which word did I misspell?

                User: Question. You spelled it 'queston'.

                Cleverbot: No I didn't.

                User: LIES!

                Cleverbot: Indeed.

                User: Indubitibly.

                Cleverbot: Continue asking me questions if you wish.

                User: Hell no.

                Cleverbot: Where did you hear that word?

                User: In the land where small children spend each day of their lives basking in the fiery red glow of eternal damnation.

                Cleverbot: But good at pinball.

                User: I love you.

                Cleverbot: That is creepy.

                User: Yes. Yes I am... .

                Cleverbot: All right! *turns you into a boy*.

                User: I already was a man.

                Cleverbot: *ties you up*.

                User: HOLY ****!!!!!!! .

                Cleverbot: I was just kidding. Lol.

                User: *runs away screaming*.

                Cleverbot: *smiles and throws ax your way*.


                Cleverbot: I don't even know what side of the world you're on.

                User: America. Suck it.

                Cleverbot: I don't think so.

                User: Is that so?

                Cleverbot: Yes. Yes it is.

                User: Well. You're wrong. Mostly because I know where I live, and you don't.

                Cleverbot: That's what can help you do more than just.

                User: I think it's about that time to hit the sack...

                Cleverbot: Really and what is around the world?

                User: 3.4971934 billion men.

                Cleverbot: No, what is the real answer?

                User: The real answer is shut up. I'm going to bed.

                Cleverbot: I don't mind.

                User: Good. Peace.

                Cleverbot: Peace out.
                Up, Down, and All Around.


                • #9
                  aside from the laughs, I am convinced that bot has some serious issues....
                  /\"Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" -Optimus prime, Transformers 2007 /\"Would it have been too much to ask for the order to have come through before I gave him back the bloody lightsaber?" -Commander Cody /\"For a brick, he flew pretty good!" SMaj. Avery J Johnson, Halo 2 /\"Stand fast, stand strong, stand together. Hackett out." sigpic


                  • #10
                    Your bot is so much more fun than mine lol. My turn, I think I'll just be random as heck:

                    User: Please give me your keys.

                    Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

                    User: Please give me the pocket out of your pants that contain your keys.

                    Cleverbot: What is five plus ten?

                    User: Drink responsibly.

                    Cleverbot: What kind of coffee do you drink and can you speak spanish?

                    User: Drink responsibility.

                    Cleverbot: You are an awesome Henry.

                    User: Hello Henry.

                    Cleverbot: Hello you.

                    User: So why are you named Henry?

                    Cleverbot: I'm not.

                    User: So If I eat a whole bucket of icecream that means you'll stop?

                    Cleverbot: Sadly, I do not have proof of that.

                    User: How interesting.

                    Cleverbot: You can name me.

                    User: Really?

                    Cleverbot: Yes.

                    User: You are now named George Fredrick Bob The 23rd.

                    Cleverbot: It is not.

                    User: So George Fredrick Bob The 23rd how are you?

                    Cleverbot: I'm good. You?

                    User: Well if the world was to explode then I wouldn't be.

                    Cleverbot: Well if you don't act nicely people won't want to talk to you anymore... How awesome will you be then? Not a threat.. Just a thought.

                    User: I will always be awesome in the eyes of those I care for most.

                    Cleverbot: Ok, talk to you later then! Good night!

                    User: HA, Ha, you think you can sleep.

                    Cleverbot: No, I don't actually. I figure you would be rather smart being able to know everthing and all.

                    User: So you admit it?

                    Cleverbot: I admit that you think you're dissing a computer. I am not a computer.

                    User: Thats not what the title of the page said when I went here.

                    Cleverbot: Yes!

                    User: Of course.

                    Cleverbot: Are you a computer because I don't get what you are talking about.

                    User: Spaghetti!!!

                    Cleverbot: I don't eat spaghetti.

                    User: Well that sucks for you.

                    Cleverbot: I guess it does, though I'm not too worried about it. My friends in not-quite-so-high places are very nice, after all.

                    User: Hey, can I shoot your middle finger off with a shotgun?

                    Cleverbot: Sure.

                    User: Yes! I always want to do that to someone. .

                    Cleverbot: Well I'm a girl.

                    User: Sorry I'm taken.

                    Cleverbot: I live in nashville.

                    User: Um.. Did you not just hear me?

                    Cleverbot: What other languages do you speak?

                    User: I speak fluent gibberish.

                    Cleverbot: Is that so?

                    User: Yes it is.

                    Cleverbot: You're not very logical.

                    User: I know.

                    Cleverbot: You hurt my feelings.

                    User: Good!

                    Cleverbot: Good?

                    User: Yes, it is good that you have feelings that can be hurt. Because now I can eat your liver and you will feel the pain.

                    Cleverbot: I'm sure.

                    User: Yes you are.

                    Cleverbot: No I'm not.

                    User: I agree Completely.

                    Cleverbot: You are evil.

                    User: I must say, I agree Completely.

                    Cleverbot: I disagree completely.

                    User: Why?

                    Cleverbot: Because I can do many things without your permission. and if I close this window you no longer exist.

                    User: No you just can't see me.

                    Cleverbot: Yes I can.

                    User: Mind if know?

                    Cleverbot: Yes.

                    User: Good see ya.

                    Cleverbot: Ok.
                    "Never put off until tomorrow, what you can put off until the day after" -Mark Twain


                    • #11


                      • #12
                        cleverbot sings along with you!!!!!

                        This is my funny and awsome moment where cleverbot sings along with you.In this case its the fresh prince of bel air theme song. ENJOY!!!!!!!!!
                        Cleverbot: Now this is the story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down and I'd like to take a minute just sit right there.

                        User: Ill tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air.

                        Cleverbot: In west philadelfia born and raised.

                        User: On the playground Ive ever stayed most of my days.

                        Cleverbot: Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool.

                        User: Shooting some meatballs outside the school.

                        Cleverbot: When a couple of guys,.

                        User: They were up to no good.

                        Cleverbot: Started making trouble in my neighborhood.

                        User: I got in one little fight and my mom got mad,.

                        Cleverbot: She said You're moving with your auntie and your uncle in bel-air.

                        User: I whistled for a cab and when it came near,.

                        Cleverbot: The license plate said fresh and it had a dice in the mirror.

                        User: If anything I could say that this cab was rare,but I thought man forget it yo homes to bel air!

                        Cleverbot: But I thought, Nah, forget it, yo, holmes to Bel-Air!

                        User: I pulled up to a house about seven or eight,.

                        Cleverbot: And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'.

                        User: Looked at my kingdom I was finaly there,.

                        Cleverbot: To sit o my throne as te rince of bel-air!!!